Thursday, July 09, 2009

Mirror Mirror on the wall.. Who will I be 10 yrs from now???

Okie.. I found the answer to this question in the funniest of places... Where?? Where??, you ask!!! No prizes for guessing.. Yahoooooooooooooo....

It was just another random day.. I woke up in the morning to a bad tummy... Queasy queasy me!!! I rubbed my eyes as I picked up my phone, and as I would have guessed, I had a couple of missed calls from Bhavik... "I can call him later", I thought.. The tummy was bothering me more than that..

Tringgggggggg Tringggggggggg.. "Now, which one is that again? The phone, the bell or the alarm??", I asked myself, in my state of groggy reality.. The phone it was...

T: Hello.. Yeah..Hey Amrita.. Tell me!!
A: Hey Tabsi.. Can you go to Tia's school today to drop her... She wants to have you around today...
T: Well, ummmmmmm, I guess I could go.. Will meet aunty and Tia directly at school!!!

The tummy wasn't ready to settle easy... So the rest of the day was spent in bed... Didn't go to Tia's school.. Bills didn't get paid either... I finally got off my arse at somewhere around 6 pm and went and showered... I scratched my bum for a long time to decide whether I was to meet Bhavik today or not.. Finally I decided to!!!

We met, we went to Cypress, we met Chinmay, we bumped into the million other lukkhas, we smoked...The usual.. Suddenly, out of the blue, Bhavik tells me, he's in the mood to drink some rum.. So we sit to drink.. At our usual spot.. We're drinking and talking.... But there comes a point when we both go relatively quiet.. We both know, we're thinking something, but in classic Tabi-Bhavik style, we dont ask each other!! We both look in different directions and drift into our thoughts..

What is it that you're doing with your life, Tabi.. I know the company is important to both of you.. But are you guys moving in the right direction... You want for both of you to be successful, don't you?? What bout Bipin!! Is he going to help you guys out?? What about the workshop?? Will that dream turn into reality?? You've been working on the idea for months now... Will it or won't it?? Where are you going to be 10 years from now?? Have you any idea??

Suddenly I felt a drop on my forearm... It had begun drizzling... We moved to a safer place... Both Bhavik and I snapped back into our normal selves.. We were talking bout our modern Ramayan script and Sholay remade our style once again... We spoke, we laughed, we hugged, we shared!!

We finally headed our own ways.. Well, it was home, in this case... And I had forgotten about the whole day.. I was just happy to be home!! I changed out of my wet clothes and sat down to get back to my favourite activity these days.. Chatting online!!! (Yeah Yeah!! I know there are like a million losers online.. I don't know what am doing there, but I am not going to deny, I like it)

My Zoo (nick for a friend) was online when I logged in... I am not used to seeing him online late in the nights.. That's when I realized that it wasn't really that late... It was afterall only 12:30 am or something like that!!! I was chatting with him, but I wasn't really hitting off a topic to keep going at.. So I decided to enter a chat room.. I clicked on Mumbai Global Chat room no.3... And I happened to find only one id that caught my attention..

I generally wouldn't go for ids that have names in it.. So like no mohit_is_here would work for me... So I clicked on this id..

t: knock knock.... anyone home??

s: hmmm...tats beter...

s: whoz dis?...n wat doya wan??

t: well, i wanna kill time wid someone who is worth the killin!!! tis is Tabitha here..

s: hey Tabitha..u sound gud enough 4 me 2 chat..but u knw wat...

t: wat?

s: m a gurl...

(Whoaaaaaaaaa... Honestly, this had never ever happened to me before online.. Me mistaking a person for a male and it turning out to be a female!!)

s: hey I knw....u wanna kill a guy..yea..

t: actually, hopin u wudnt gemme wrong or wateva girl... i aint really rejoicin ova section 377 or wateva.. am straight as can be!!! but i wudnt mind killin tym wid a girl either... coz i aint technically 'lookin' long as its good talk, i wud be game!!!

s: hey tats sounds really gud

t: unless of course, i wud keep u away from the men!!

s: as long as u r worth it...wont mind!

t: where r u from girl?

s: wher doya think m frm?

t: well, mumbai am assumin ... but a lil specification wudnt hurt!!

s: Bingo !!!.. nups not at d suburbs?..n urself?

t: am from Mulund to be precise... wat do u do n wat can i call ya.. n u awreddy know am Tabitha

s: ma frnds call me Madz...

t: okie dokie madz girl... i run an events co. of ma own.. wat do u do!!

(She gives me an emoticon tat screams 'shocked')

t: n the shockin part wud be?

s: m almost doing d sam stuff...

t: is tat so... ur into events too?

s: was in media..working as a producer

t: so mebbe we cud work together some time... i was in the media too..was a copy editor tho!! so some similar backgrounds we're talkin bout here!!

s: hey started as a copy writer

t: am assumin its safe to say ur older than me!!

s: 33 ... n wats ur no.?

t: 22

s: wow...even tats almost similar... double 2's n double 3's...
I now run a school of performing arts

t: woah... ur scarin me now...

s: n y's tat?

t: waddya teach!!

s: dance, music , dramatics

t: woah woman... I happen to teach dance too... n wanna open a similar performin arts school myself!! tis is way too freaky now!! when's ur bday ? lets try our luck!!

s: 18th dec

t: atleast there is no commonality there .... 29th oct... so wat forms of dance

s: everything under d sun basically

t: *ears perked up*

s: hip hop , ball room , bollywood

t: u teach urself or u got instructors?

s: now I got instructors... watchabout u?

t: i specialize in Latin Ballroom

s: wow!

t: where wud ur place be??

s: I got ma studio in borivali west... y don u com down

t: i wud love to... when ?

s: Nytime 4ya!!!!!!!

t: u temme..sundays good?

s: yup! here's ma number...

t: okie gimme a min... lemme note it down

s: sure

t: mebbe wen we meet, if ur free, we cud go chill for awhile... n actually catch up.. girl on girl!!

s: u knw wat??......I badly need 2 do somthing lik tat

s: u seem 2 b d 1st gurl....I actually lik!

t: so madz.. hav i successfully managed to keep u off the men??

s: yea.... u did gurl

Only God remembers what happened next and I was diallin her no.... Part of me was just not ready to believe that this really was a woman..

She answered.. "Hello, Tabitha is this you... Hi!! Tis is Madz here!!" Phew!!! Atleast I knew it really was a woman!!!

What transpired after that was pure luck or destiny, I don't know which of the two.. But it was one of the most beautiful conversations I have ever had!!!

She and I had similar childhoods.. Both ridden with the guilt of hiding things from our dear ones.. Both of us had been rebellious teens, notorious in our own rites... We both had loved dogs all our lives.. she has one, I hav one too... She used to blog.. I do now... She wanted to open a pet shelter of sorts.. I wanted to open a pet motel... She dances.. I do too.. She's an entrepreneur.. Am a buddin entrepreneur!!! She always wanted to adopt a daughter... I wanna adopt one too (sigh...someday) She began her career wid the media... So did I.. She jumped jobs before she found her sweetspot.. Am doing exactly that today.. The similarities were endless..

She needed a friend and I needed a mentor.. We found exactly that in each other.. I never ever realized a random rendevouz online could lead to so much joy.. She's definitely like my soul sister..

I am looking forward to meeting her on Sunday... We have also promised to discuss the possibilities of working together some day.. But like they say, never mix business with pleasure.. So it's going to be a tough one to crack.. She made my day, my night, my week to come, my life!! Looking forward to a life long relationship given the crackling start we had...

And yes.. I know now, perhaps, what am going to be doing 10 years from now.. I think the mirror answered me loud and clear!!!

Sunday, July 05, 2009

Roll Another Joint - 2

She felt a shiver go down her spine.. "Just exactly what did he have in mind?", she wondered!!
She hung her head low and walked along side him.. Strugglin to keep up wid him...

They managed to get a rickshaw.. She looked around nervously... Everythin was so quiet.. Hardly any people around... There was somethin tat made her feel queasy bout the whole place... They reached their destination.. He hadnt really spoken to her the whole way... "Dont mind me.. Am jus a lil high on some weed!!" he said.. Well, like tat was any reassurance!!

He raced up the stairs and she followed.. As soon as she entered his friend's house, she knew somethin was terribly wrong with the place... But she was glad she had Angelo wid her...

"Tis is Natasha.. Natasha, tis is Sean, Farida and Imran.. And tats Baba..." They all smiled welcomingly at her!! She returned a half hearted smile... "Why cant i jus be myself.. Wats botherin me so much", she thought to herself...

"Wine anyone?" Sean's voice broke into her thoughts and she zapped back... "Yeah sure... I wouldn't mind some" she said.. It surprisingly turned out to be some good wine... She opened her bag and fetched out her packet of ciggies... In her excitement she hadnt smoked the whole day...

Sean: So Natasha.. Can I call u Nats? (Natasha nods) Okie thanks... So Nats, do you smoke weed as well or ciggies it is for u??
Nats: No weed for me.. I tried it when I was in college... But no more.. ONLY ciggies for me now..
Angelo: Sugar, Puff Puff Pass
Nats: Huh?
Angelo: Pass the ciggie on sugar
Nats: Oh ok!!

Sean smiles.. Angelo smiles... Nats feels uneasy again... 'Exactly wats causin my stomach to churn so much?' In the meanwhile bottle is empty...

They were sittin on the terrace to drink, and to move back to the hall, they had to pass through one of the bedrooms.. Angelo lets everyone pass up ahead and he holds Nats back as well.. Suddenly before she knows it, he pushes her against the wall and starts frantically kissin her neck... She doesnt like it.. But she cant push it back...

Nats:(feebly) Stop it Ango
Angelo: Y? Did I do somethin wrong?
He's still pushed up against her.. It's hurtin her.. But she doesnt know wat to say..
Angelo: Werent u the one who told me u wanna make love to me when we meet?
Nats : Errrrr.. Well...
She couldn't even retaliate... Coz she had, in fact, said those exact words...
Angelo: (accusing tone taking over) Then wat.. U didnt like me?? I aint good enuf for u??
Nats: Nuttin like tat (He did fit the bill of 'good lookin' accordin to her sensibility)

So he continues kissing her and suddenly she feels his hand slidin inside her top, she tries to grab his hand.. But too late.. He's already grabbin at her breasts like he wants to pull em outta her..
"Ouch... You're hurting me Angy!!!" But he didnt stop... He unbuttoned her top.. He was too strong for her... If she screamed his friends may hav come to her rescue or mebbe, jus mebbe they cud make things worse... She hadnt seen Farida all this time as well.. Where had she disappeared?? He almost had her top off now.. He lustily put his mouth to her breasts.. She had dreamt about all of this.. But now, it didnt seem as pleasant.. He was infact abusin her... And she had no clue as to wat to do.. Her mind started racing.. If she had to even lodge a complaint against him ever, she wud be in trouble..Coz she was the one who had sent him raunchy msgs ova the week.. Too far fetched a thought anyways... What was she to do right now, this given moment..

Suddenly he stopped... "I smell weed", he said... And a min later he opened the door, didnt even wait for her to button up... Sean was standin rite at the door with a joint.. 'I think he caught a glimpse of me' she thought to herself... She sat there... Her head dizzy with thoughts now... The room around her dark... She walked towards the bed and sat down... Suddenly something brushed against her back... She turned around and almost yelled.. It had scared the hell outta her... There was a guy lyin down on the bed... He was sleepin.. He had been there the whole while... Did he see anything of wat hpnd??

She had no clue... Suddenly he opened his eyes and said 'I know wat u guys were upto'... She screamed.. And the next thing she knew, Sean came runnin in...
"What happened?" he asked her... "He just said something"; she was shakin by now.. "He's asleep Nats... What's wrong wid u girl?"

She was on the verge of cryin by now.. Sean could see that, so he held her for awhile.. Very funnily, she felt a certain amount of solace by bein in Sean's arms... But she didnt trust him either... "Here... Y dont u smoke this?" he said and passed her a joint... "I dont wanna Sean" "Cmon, trust me girl.. Am here for you na!!"

So she puffed.. She puffed puffed and passed...

She woke up wid a headache the next morn... She had passed out last nite... Wat had happened? Who had brought her to the terrace... She was lyin down on a mattress wid a sheet covering her and she was naked.. Not a single shred of cloth on her body.. Suddenly Angy walked in... He was in his shorts and wasn't wearin his vest...

"Angy, did we... like...errr...last nite?"
"No baby we didnt!! Though I would have loved to... But tat bastard Sean got lucky... What a bytch you are.. Made out wid me 1st and then bedded him... So you hav any more left in you?? Wanna do me now? I hav had a hard on since last nite"; he smirked...

She felt filthy... Dirty... She picked up the sheet and covered herself and ran into the bedroom... Sean was sittin there.. Talkin to Farida... "Hey goodmorn baby.." He bent fwd and kissed her on the cheek.. She shud hav been angry at the man... But she still felt a warm flush when he touched her..."Where are my clothes?" He pointed out to the cupboard.. She opened it and found her clothes all neatly folded... She pulled em outta the cupboard, ran to the bathroom and dressed up..

When she came out, Sean asked her "So ready to go?" "Yeah!!" she replied sheepishly.. What was wrong wid her? She jus couldnt seem to get angry at this guy... Her womanly instinct told her that this guy had done something good to her...As she picked up her bag to leave, he rose up as well... "Chalo Farida.. C ya later den... Bye Angy!!"

"Where are u headed Sean?" Nats asked... "Well, I wouldn't expect you to travel back alone.. I'll take you home", he replied.. She found herself smiling at the guy who may have just raped her last nite.. Well rape would be a rather harsh word to use, coz she wasnt really sure as to whether she had given consent under the influence of the weed!!!

She bade goodbye to everyone.. She didnt even bother lookin at Angelo... Well, guy of her dreams?? Well, perhaps not.. She walked outta the house and Sean followed her.. He placed his hand on the small of her back as they walked... Was it outta protectiveness or was he tryin to stake ownership? She had no clue... They sat in a rickshaw and she lit a ciggie, offered him one too...

Nats: So Sean.. Errr.. (clearin her throat) What EXACTLY happened last nite?
Sean: Do you really wanna know? (A cute devilish smile spreading across his face)

The rickshaw vroomed away onwards towards the station as he elaborated and explained things to her in the utmost detailed manner he could...


Natasha stood at the window of her new house.. The breeze hittin her cheeks softly.. She was glowing... She couldnt stop smiling.. She generally couldn't when her man was around her... The door bell rang... She ran excitedly to open the door... There he was, standin in a crisp white shirt and white denims, lookin as dashing as ever... "Hey Sean!! How u been honey!!!"she said as she hugged him... He'd bought em some wine... "Woman, you're glowing!! N hows ma baby doin?"he asked as he pointed to her now evident baby bump.. "Well, you're baby's doin jus fine.. N jus to reconfirm.. It's not yours.. You do remember, rite?"

Suddenly she felt his arms around her waist.. He came from the back and held her, resting his chin on her shoulder.. She tilted her head sideways and kissed him on the cheek.. "How's ma girl treatin you Sean boy" he asked... "Very well mr.. You have disappeared ever since you guys moved in together...No weed no more eh??" Sean said.. "You will understand someday when you fall in love, you dodo.. Am I not right hun?" he asked Nats.. "You always are dahlin"she blushed... Sean excused himself to answer a phone call.. One of his million girlfriends perhaps.. Lol..

Nats turned around to look at her man... He held her at the waist and she threw her arms around his neck.. He looked her in the eye and said "I love you Nats..." She smiled and replied "I love you too Angelo!!"

*Angelo had tried to control Natasha in her drunken stupor coupled with the weed high... But she had become extremely horny.. She generally did when she was drunk... She chose to go for Sean... She had led him to the terrace.. Undressed herself and presented herself on a platter to him... Angelo had tried to intervene.. But she wasnt goin to listen to him.. She wanted Sean.. She wanted him bad.. And while Sean kissed her and made love to her, she constantly kept sayin Angelo's name... She apparently thought Angelo was Sean and vice versa.. The weed had played a nasty trick on her.. Sean, bein the sweetheart that he was, had realized what was happening, so he didnt continue with the act and put her to sleep instead... He narrated the whole thing to Angelo later and apologized for having acted stupid himself... And Angelo and Nats had made up... Coz after all, they were purrfect for each other!!!*

Friday, July 03, 2009

Roll Another Joint

Before any of you get judgemental and condemn me for only puttin up lyrics in the forms of posts, I need to warn you that there is much more to tis post than meets the eye in the beginning..

Its bout a journey to another town called 'Wonderland' and returning unscathed!!

Let me run with you tonight
and i'll take you on a moonlight ride
There's someone i used to see
but she don't give a damn for me

But let me get to the point
Let's roll another joint
And turn the radio loud
I'm too alone to be proud
You don't know how it feels
You don't know how it feels
to be me...

People come People go
Some grow young Some grow cold
I woke up in between
A memory and a dream

So let's get to the point
Let's roll another joint
Let's head on down the road
There's somewhere I gotta go
And you don't know how it feels
You don't know how it feels
to be me...

My old man was born to rock
He's still tryin to beat the clock
Think of me what you will
I got a little space to fill

So let's get to the point
Let's roll another joint
Let's head on down the road
There's somewhere i gotta go

And you don't know how it feels
You don't know how it feels
No you don't know how it feels
to be me...
(These are the lyrics to Tom Petty's track 'Roll Another Joint'!!! )

It was just another day for Natasha (name changed on request)... She sat down, opened her lappy and started toyin around... Shuffling thru tracks.. Viewing images.. All of that jazz tat u do when ur really bored... But she was still bored.. Wonderin what to do wid this free time she had.. She wasnt used to havin free time!!! She decided to log into a yahoo chat room (loser I hear u say)

guy_from_mumbai: Do you want to s_x me?

hot_male_4_u: Would u wanna see my &%$^on cam?(Yeah whatever... Buzz off)

dark_chocolate: Heya...Wassup!!! How u doin girl!!! (Okay so this one seems different)

Conversation ensues..Nats gets to know that this guy is a buddin musician... Works in a call centre otherwise!!!They continue chattin for a while.. Its gettin even more interestin.. He seems to hav everything that she has ever looked for in a guy (well except the call centre job... she cud hav done wid better... but wat the heck!!!)

Our girl starts feelin sleepy now.. Eyes are gettin heavier... Starin at the screen is becomin a tedious job... So she decides to log out..
Nats: Okie.. I hate to cut tis short (well it's almost been like 1 1/2 hours now) but am really feelin sleepy now.. I cant look at a computer screen for any longer...

dark_chocolate: Hey.. can i ask u for somethin?? Wud u mind givin me ur no.. I cud call u rite now.. Am bored... N I hav really really enjoyed talkin to u all this time!!!

(Hmmmmmmm... Should I? Should I not?)
Before she knew it, she found her fingers typing out her no. "Why am I doing this? Giving my no. to a complete stranger?" Too late.. He was already calling!!!

Nats: Hello there!!!
Angelo: Hey woman.. Waddup... Am so happy you gave me ur no.!! I wudnt wanna lose touch wid u eva!!!
Nats: Y is tat?
Angelo: Cmon.. Dont temme you dont feel it?
Nats: What!! Feel wat!! (Hands tremblin)
Angelo: The connect.. Btwn u n me!!!
Nats: Errr.. What connect?
Angelo: Cmon girl.. Dont play 'hard to get'!!
Nats: (Blushin) Wellll...

The conversation ensued!!! They spoke about anything and everything under the sun (well almost)!!! Everything from his music, to world music, to sex, to weed.. "He dopes a lot", she thought to herself.. Well, weed seemed to be the only queen in his world and hashish the king!!

The talks continued.. For an entire week... The connect grew and wid it their longing to meet each other.. Seemed weird eh!! A woman of Natasha's stature, who hardly ever behaved illogically, behavin it the most absurd of manners.. Callin up a guy like Angelo, who she hardly knew, in every free wakin minute she could find!!

And then one week later, the ultimate call came...
Angelo: Hey suga!!!
Nats: (blushin) Hey baby!! How u doin!! (She loved it when he called her sugar)
Angelo: Sugar, lissen up baby, my friend's folks r pushin outta town for like a week.. We're all plannin to park our asses there.. Y dont u join us?
Nats: Errrrr.. Am not sure..
Angelo: What? U dont trust me sugar?

The arguments followed.. The pleading continued.. 5 days passed and she found herself sayin yes.. Did she jus say YES to spendin an entire nite wid a weird guy she met online wid weird dopie friends... Cooped up in a flat which was nethin but 2 hours away from her place!! Shaite... Quite a situation she had put herself into.. But she didnt wanna say no either.. It was more like, she couldnt say no... This guy, Angelo, he somehow seemed to be controllin her mind!! She wanted to break free and run.. But she cudnt.. An invisible trap seemed to be blockin her passage further or her escape to the exit where she came in from!!!

Finally she found herself alightin the train at the specified station.. "What am I doin here?"

She tried callin Angelo.. No answer.. Was tis somebody's idea of a joke? If it was, it definitely wasnt funny.. Coz it was already 11 p m in the nite.. Travellin back alone from this god forsaken place also didnt seem like such a welcomin idea... N the platforms were deserted... Not a single soul!!!

Suddenly her phone rings.. She's startled, drops of sweat beginning to form on her brow; she picks up...
Angelo: Hey suga.. (pantin profusely)
Nats:What happened?
Angelo: I am takin a shortcut.. Am runnin there.. Gimme a min.. DONT MOVE.. will be there in a min!!!
Nats: Okie (the unmistakeable tone of doubt)
Angelo: Alrite!! I jus want u to turn around; coz I see you..

There he was, in all his glory.. Standin tall at 6'1"... Broad shouldered, lean guy... Just as he had described, jus as she had pictured him!!!They walked towards each other... They hugged, like they had never hugged b4.. She kissed him on the neck, a light peck, while they still hugged!! They separated slowly, and he began walking.... He wasnt even holdin her hand, but she could feel the energy flow between em.. It was at its peak.. She so badly wanted to hold him for longer, kiss him, make love to him...

Nats: So how many ppl r there at ur friend's?
Angelo: Well around 7 of em!!!
Nats: Errr..Do they know am comin?
Angelo: Of course.. I hav been jumpin like a monkey the whole day.. Waitin for u to come here..
Nats: Okie
Angelo: You wait n watch now... I'm gonna get u high on some weed as well.. Then lets c who cares bout how many ppl are around...
Nats: I thought I told you.. No weed for me.. Am clean..
Angelo: You think I will let u go jus like tat? (sinister smile spreadin across his face)

She felt a shiver go down her spine.. "Just exactly what did he have in mind?", she wondered!!
She hung her head low and walked along side him.. Strugglin to keep up wid him...